The Edge of Glory

 There I was….driving in my soccer-mom minivan.   My head whirling with many thoughts.  But not really typical soccer-mom thoughts.  You see, I am no average soccer mom.  I am a mom to a beautiful young nine year old girl with autism.  And mom to stunning, witty (and soccer playing) six year old daughter with sensory processing disorder. And mama to a 19 month-old little boy who is so typical it makes me cry. 

I was driving to see the pediatrician for his 18 month old check-up which usually is centered around vaccinations.  In my head I was imagining how it was going to go down when I told her no vaccinations today.  How I would get the standard lecture. You see, I put him on a very conservative immunization schedule and he was due for his third DTaP shot today.  I was imagining what she would say when I told her that ever since his third HIB shot at 15 months, he has had loose stools.  I just knew she would look at me like, “how could that possibly be related?”  Just like she looked at me when I told her no more shots for my second daughter after she regressed terribly after her third DTaP shot at 12 months.

This pediatrician knows me. She knows my family history.  She knows that my father got polio from a polio vaccine when he was a child and stayed in the hospital a year.  And that my father also suffered from Guillain-Barre about five years ago for a six-month spell.  She knows not to push too hard or I might push back.  

But then this song came on the radio.  Lady Gaga’s “Edge of Glory”.  My eyes welled up with tears and I felt my strength come back.  Because that is where we are with Marley…my oldest.  We are on the Edge of Glory.  We are getting closer every day to recovery.  Our latest intervention is with Brain Balance and the progress we see is remarkable.  It is like watching a flower bloom on fast forward.  It is nothing short of miraculous.

And because I have followed my intuition, she is healing.  She is coming back to us.  I have learned never to ignore that intuition again.  There was a time where I put my children’s health in the hands of a pediatrician.  But now I realize that doctors do not know my children as I do.  And every child is different.  They need to be treated as such.  So I have taken it upon myself to be in primary charge of their wellness.  To educate myself on what is best for my children and to monitor their diet, their sleep, and their exercise.  I pay attention to what foods cause problems for them with their behavior and bowel movements. I learn what supplements can enhance their wellness and why.

 And my biggest task and life’s purpose is to bring my oldest back from the grips of autism.  Because she belongs with us.  Not with a diagnosis.  And our family is on the Edge of Glory.  Waiting for Marley to join us.